<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/5497337296217708276?origin\x3dhttp://in-candescence.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>



profile entries tagboard links
mercy
If I could be any part of you, I'd be your tears
Conceived in your heart
Born in your eyes
Live on your cheeks
And die on your lips


Monday, June 7, 2010, 11:01 PM
Adagio

Giving up is a form of escape.
But life never provided a detailed escape route.
If I do escape one day, I'll escape to Wonderland.
Maybe I'll enjoy a cup of tea and vanish.
The thing is, you can't vanish without leaving behind a trace.
It's just whether one would want to seek you, or leave you in subtle mystery.

People have been telling me I'm stubborn.
Okay, yes, I admit I am stubborn.
So since Im so stubborn and annoying all of you, why not you just leave me alone, and then no one will get annoyed, no one will be sad, no one will feel like they've done a disservice.
For all the past wrong, for all my wilful thinking, I am sorry.
For all the pain, the suffering, the time, the effort, the pixels on the screen, I am yet again sorry.
I know I'm annoying to all of my friends, people probably won't ever want to hear me anymore, so yes, leave me alone.
And don't ever care about me anymore.
And for you, if you are caring now, or you have been always caring, then I'm sorry. Don't care anymore.

When presented with a polished surface, I'm sorry, but I'll scrutinise the cracks that were once there. And with that, in literal sense, I can't forget that easily, I can't put aside the past problems, and when I look at them altogether, they seem bigger than life, and I feel scared and intimidated to approach again. I know no one is perfect, but I'm a perfectionist, and it's difficult to look past the flaws, but to stop and stare at it, possibly hoping it'll vanish.

I'm sorry cos I always make myself look high and mighty. I am not. And I know you hate that point you just somehow failed to mention. I hate my own face too, sometimes, I wish I wasn't born with this personality, this face, this brain which is good for nothing. Sure, I may have many achievements, but if trigonometry can ever solve this, maybe I'll have better success at it.

Having said all these, it isn't all my imperfections. I'm just hoping that when you stalk my blog and see this, you'll be a step further into hating me and maybe you'll not care. No matter how hypocritical the previous request is, I want you to not care anymore. Don't waste your efforts on me, I'm not worth it.